I went to Italy for a spot of shopping last Saturday. My hubby was actually doing all of the shopping, I was just being a helpful little wife, who would bring him shirts in right sizes and all that.
Since I had a lot of time on my hands, I was naturally doing some observing. First thing I noticed: shop assistants. They were all gay. I love gay men (not in the biblical sense, of course). They have so much style and grace it is almost painful to watch. Especially for me, as I sometimes feel a little challenged in the style department.
So there I was, torturing myself with these self-depreciating thoughts, when it occurred to me. The gay shop assistants were very attentive to all of the attractive men customers. They are probably attentive to all of their customers, but I only noticed how they behave to handsome men, since my hubby is just yummy. Ahem. I understand why they would lust after him. And he enjoyed it, of course. Again not in the biblical sense, but in the purely egotistical sense. He loved being adored.
Just to test this theory, I strolled over to the women's department. There were a few quite grumpy looking Italian women pretending to be shop assistants there. They were all irritatingly skinny and good looking, I might add. I felt out of place. Again.
So I have a little suggestion for all you shop owners out there. I understand you need to have female shop assistants in the women’s departments, as we don’t like to discuss our bum sizes and all of the other dirty body details with men. Hire some nice lesbians instead. We will be relaxed around them and they will be happy to see us, but not in the threatening male heterosexual way. I would love to be adored as I shop. I think this would work for all of us quite well.
